


We All Fall Down

by ArgentSleeper



Series: Ring Around the Rosie [1]
Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Angst, Infidelity, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-11
Updated: 2015-09-11
Packaged: 2018-04-20 06:09:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 965
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4776512
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ArgentSleeper/pseuds/ArgentSleeper
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He had to put effort into this.  Arthur would be able to tell; Arthur would <em>know</em> if Merlin's mind and heart were not fully engaged.  So Merlin licked into the hot mouth on his and tried to make his fingers clench in passion instead of anxiety.</p>
            </blockquote>





	We All Fall Down

**Author's Note:**

> I am so so sorry.

 

The stars were bright that night.  Somehow that didn't seem right.

Merlin straddled the lap in front of him, undulating his hips to get more friction and letting out a throaty groan to show his pleasure.  He had to put effort into this.  Arthur would be able to tell; Arthur would _know_ if Merlin's mind and heart were not fully engaged.  So Merlin licked into the hot mouth on his and tried to make his fingers clench in passion instead of anxiety.

It was only for a bit longer.  Just a few more seconds, a minute at most-

The click behind him couldn't have been louder than a few decibels, but to his ears it was deafening.  Even worse was the strangled gasp of hurt that followed, the voice dripping with pain and betrayal. "Merlin?"

He couldn't turn around.  He just couldn't.  If he did he would never be able to pull off the sly nonchalant tone he needed to have as he threw out the words like knives.  "Sorry, Arthur.  A guy has needs.  Guess you couldn't meet them all."

He wasn't sure who the knives were stabbing more.

Merlin could feel the man underneath him stiffen as he realized what was going on, that he’d been used, but he forced himself to ignore that as he attached himself to the stranger once more, sucking and biting on his neck. For some reason the man didn’t try to shove him off, for which Merlin was grateful.  He could only manage enough focus for the rage pouring off Arthur in waves.  There would be screaming soon, and Arthur would probably yank Merlin off the interloper and punt the poor man into next week.  Then there would be words that couldn't be taken back and slammed doors and split belongings.  And Arthur wouldn't know that he could have them all, could take everything so long as he never came back.

Arthur stammered for a moment, for the first time since Merlin had known him unable to put a sentence together.  It wasn't right.  Arthur was the most eloquent person he knew.  His speeches at charity functions were moving enough to have people donating their first born children. “How could- _why_ -”

He had to up the ante. It was the only way. Merlin had planned these words carefully, each designed to hit Arthur right where it hurt most. It would probably be best to face him now, before Arthur forced him to, but he busied himself with shoving his hands under the stranger’s shirt and tweaking a nipple, making him gasp in pleasure despite the embarrassment blooming on his face. “I’m surprised you didn’t figure it out earlier. I’ve practically been fucking them under your nose for ages now. But then again, I’m not _that_ surprised. Your father always did say you weren’t the brightest of lads.”

Arthur was positively seething now, and Merlin just knew how he would look, his gentle hands balled tight, beautiful face gone pale with fury. He wasn’t forming words at all by this point. Merlin nearly broke and turned to make sure he hadn’t dropped dead of apoplexy. Morgana always said he was only one stressor away from a heart attack.

In the end it seemed everything he wanted to say boiled down to three words, each one dripping with enough frost and malice to kill.

" _Fuck you, Merlin_."

Merlin barely managed for the five seconds it took Arthur to storm from the flat they'd lived and loved in together for the last three years.  The second the door smashed closed he was on his feet and racing for the bathroom to vomit into the toilet.  He sobbed through the rolling of his stomach, heaving until nothing was coming up but bile and pain.  He didn't even notice the man he'd picked up at the pub that night until he was shoving a glass of water in Merlin's face.

"You could have mentioned you had a boyfriend," he said.  Whether he was disappointed or angry about being used Merlin was beyond caring about deciphering.

"Fiancé," he croaked back, throat burning as much as his eyes.  "He was my fiancé."

He'd left his ring on the little side table by the door.  He wondered if it was still there. The masochistic part of him hoped it was.  

"Hell of a way to treat a fiancé.  I don't think he's going to forgive you for this one."

He wouldn't.  Arthur wasn't that sort.  And all of their friends would take his side, would be furious at Merlin for breaking Arthur's delicate heart.  They would despise Merlin until the end of his days.

Just as Merlin intended.

"Get out," he ordered.  The man didn't budge, but Merlin was done with holding back his feelings tonight.  " _Get out!_ " He bellowed, stumbling to his feet and shoving the stranger through the door into the hall, slamming the door the same way Arthur had not long ago.

The ring was gone.

Merlin collapsed right there in his entryway, curling into a ball and sobbing until his body simply had no more tears to shed.  It was over.  It was done, and Merlin should feel relieved.  He _would_ feel relieved tomorrow, when he remembered why the hell he was putting them through this torture.  Merlin knew this nightmare; he'd gone through it before.  He could not force any of them to suffer with him.  And after...

It was for Arthur's own good.  Arthur had to be safe and happy and loved.

From behind Merlin's closed eyes he could still read the words that had been burned on his retinas a few days before.

 

 

 

> _MRI revealed 5 cm mass at junction of occipital lobe and cerebellum._
> 
> _Biopsy results confirmed presence of malignant cells._
> 
> _Diagnosis: Grade III astrocytoma_
> 
>  
> 
> _Prognosis: Poor_

 

 


End file.
